They Blew Up Japan
April 15th, 2018 | parenting
Sometimes the raw honesty and directness of childhood takes my breath away.
His Own League
March 17th, 2018 | adoption
Recently I got a text message from another dad at school. “My son’s interested in joining/playing baseball with yours, can you tell me more about your league?” he asked. “Also is there a get-together at Fenton’s Ice Cream for the team tomorrow afternoon? We’ll try to make it.”
Anniversary, with Tween
February 21st, 2018 | adoption parenting
It was the 9th anniversary of the day we met, though not our wedding anniversary, which will be 5 years in August. My head spins at how quickly it goes.
An Hour of My Own
February 11th, 2018 | adoption
It’s Girl Scout cookie season, and you’ve got to hit it early and hit it hard. We had our booth set up on Solano Avenue. It was normally chilly for February, but somewhat of a shock after a hot, gorgeous week that was anything but normal. It’s fun to see the girls sell in a pack. When we first arrive and it’s just me and Shayla, she’s shy and doesn’t want to look at or interact with our potential customers, but once another girl or two are there the group sales mind takes over, and they’re chanting “Girl Scout Cookies” loud enough to be heard way down the block. You’re welcome, Peet’s Coffee patrons. And sorry.
Fever and Delirium
January 23rd, 2018 | parenting
It’s tiresome, how unprepared I am for the things that inevitably happen.
My Month Off Facebook
December 29th, 2017 | daily life
It was an impulse, unplanned, but in retrospect inevitable. This had been coming. In early December I deleted Facebook off my phone.
The Breaking Point
November 25th, 2017 | parenting
The school secretary sounded serious. “Your daughter is ok, but I think she needs to be seen by a doctor,” she told me. She’d slipped in the mud playing football and her arm hurt.
Rebuilding
October 14th, 2017 | daily life
My mother lived only 2 days into her 54th year, and the end of her life was a case study of how we sometimes ramp up, into expensive and invasive treatment and activity, just when some softening and easing would be perfect. “We’ll fight this and beat this” has its place, but the push and urgency and violence of medical interventions that might make sense if the patient could recover seem a cruel setup when “winning” isn’t likely. Framing death as losing isn’t the nicest trip to lay on someone who should be settling her business and getting ready to leave the planet in peace.
Cub Scouts and Knausgaard
October 3rd, 2017 | daily life parenting
Really all I need is a simple way back to now. And I need it again, and again, and again. When I escape the trap of my worries, the real world seems so solid and beautiful.
Labor, and Rest
September 4th, 2017 | parenting
As an anxious person, I spend a lot of time trying to calm myself (and others) down. As a loving person I long to be in synch with and connected to people.
Notes on (Family) Camp
August 6th, 2017 | holidays and celebrations
We spent a week at a camp for GLBT families July 29 to August 6. Yes, 8 days of camp. Here are some notes and photos.
Remembering Finnegan, 2001 – 2017
July 24th, 2017 | daily life
Finnegan was 16 and a half years old, which is quite up there for a Jack Russell Terror Terrier. Most of his life he was everything you’d expect: feisty and full of bravado, snuggly and in need of comfort. Jay says that as a puppy Finnegan charged out into the back yard, barking fiercely and wildly at a baby raccoon. He put on quite a show, but when called back inside, he came. And fainted dead away.
My Children Far, and Near
July 1st, 2017 | adoption parenting
We’re just back from a week at family camp.
Summer Fever Dream
June 8th, 2017 | daily life
We’ve needed rain so much, and the Spring delivered. Rain, and rain, and more rain. We’re headed into the dry season but the plants are gloriously happy. The pollen shimmers in the warming air, and as the kids’ summer break speeds towards me I find myself in a strangely frantic lethargy. There’s so much to do, yet a strangely limp energy to work with. In the morning none of us can wake up, a wooly blanket over us when it seems like the early sunrise should light up our spirits.
Saying No to the Spring Fling
April 13th, 2017 | holidays and celebrations
The speeding up of life has been well documented, but it continues to take me by surprise. Each annual event that comes along, Jay says “I can’t believe it’s time for that already, it seems like it was just a few months ago.”
Funeral
April 5th, 2017 | daily life
Jay’s aunt Leona Cohen passed this week. She was 91. The end was expected, but then it didn’t come for awhile. She rallied and had a good period. It felt like a surprise when she died on Sunday, but I guess death always feels like a surprise, unbelieveable even as it is unavoidable.