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Quitting

September 27th, 2016|

Two recent endings have me feeling a bit deflated, though it’s been tough to figure out exactly why.

First, I’m giving up standing at work, or at least most of the time. I’d had great hopes for the benefits (health! vigor!), but after more than a year trying it, I think it’s mostly substituted back stuff for […]

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Puppy Medicine

September 19th, 2016|

It wasn’t long after we started trying marijuana that we realized we wanted another dog. Even though the pot was being ingested by our elderly dog Finnegan, I’m sure more than one person hearing this news will think we’re high on drugs ourselves, but no. (For the record, the canine cannabis is non psycho-active. You can read more here.)

We’d noticed that […]

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My Dog’s Pot Club

September 5th, 2016|

I’ve never been a big fan of marijuana. The couple times I tried it, decades ago, I had strong, unpleasant reactions. I’m told it’s exponentially stronger today, which sounds much worse. I have no particular feelings about its use, though stoner culture doesn’t appeal to my German Protestant work ethic. For relaxation (not that we […]

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Summer Storms and Switching Places

August 6th, 2016|

I should know not to tempt fate. Maybe a year ago I started feeling cocky, like we’d gotten this parenting thing down. Nobody knows what they’re doing, of course, but I felt we’re going to survive it—the adults, the kids, our marriage. I felt that everyone will emerge, more or less, unscathed.

And of course we will, […]

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Coming Out

July 6th, 2016|

It was time to start telling people. Probably past time.

There’s a dull pounding in my ears.

I take a breath, and steady myself. As nonchalantly as possible, I say “Yeah, Jaden’s in kindergarten in the fall…”

Pause. “…Again.”

It’s strange how vividly every time I ever told someone I’m gay flashes before my eyes when I’ve got an even mildly […]

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My Bad

May 17th, 2016|

One of the perks of writing — and I guess parenting — is that I get to be right so much of the time, or imagine that I am. School dropoff is time for the adults to share war stories, and these don’t tend to paint our little dears in a great light. They’re headed to class, unable to rebut […]

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Time Out

May 15th, 2016|

I’ve stormed out of the house again. Standing by the garage, I see my neighbor up the street wrangling clippings into the green bin, and I think maybe I’ll head up there. Make conversation. But I’m not sure. There’s a wet dishtowl over my shoulder, and probably a fire in my eye. I might seem […]

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Four Years

March 27th, 2016|

We just saw Laurie Anderson’s lovely documentary Heart of a Dog, about losing her mother and her Rat Terrier Lola Bell, and obliquely about losing Lou Reed. It’s really about memory and loss and the strange business of being alive.

Anderson tells this amazing story about a long hospital stay when she was a kid, and while she’s […]

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She Doesn’t Like Surprises

February 29th, 2016|

You can know someone for a long time and still not get it.

Last week I picked Shayla up from school, headed to an appointment. I’m sure we’d talked about it, the time, the plan, everything. But from the dark cloud on her face I could tell she was not expecting me.

“Poppa is supposed to pick me […]

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Two Books

February 19th, 2016|

As a somewhat introverted person, my different roles sometimes feel like parallel lives. I’m a father, a son, a husband. A web producer, geek, proud member of the PTA. I’m a gay man, a political moderate (not easy!) and have my level 2 Reiki certification.

But perhaps my most solitary, private role is reader. Absorbed in a book, I have […]

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Death and Cookies

February 5th, 2016|

The girl scout industrial complex landed this week and there was nowhere to hide. Of course it’s my own fault. Last year Shayla got excited and we sold lots of cookies. When the Troop needed a Cookie Manager, it seemed harmless enough. Why not store a few cookies in the garage and help out?

Fast forward: cookie class, […]

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Getting My Walk

January 18th, 2016|

The rains keep coming, and if it’s not the full solution to our drought, it’s a step in the right direction. Besides, I love the rain. Nothing like a few hours of quiet, reading the paper, enjoying the rain outside… Oh.

Maybe I mean I loved the rain before kids (BK).

I’m sure even BK I spent more […]

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The Hard Work of Good Fun

January 3rd, 2016|

I laughed out loud to read my friend Whitney’s caption under a delightful movie of her child sledding in snow. “This video is misleading,” she wrote, “Today has not been all fun and games.” While she’s always enjoyable to read (and her blog 510 Families is an East Bay must for parents), my delight was also because I’d […]

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Happy 2016: The Cheesy Holiday Letter Goes Online

December 4th, 2015|

I was carrying the Halloween box up from the garage, and Jay seemed dazed. “It seems more like last month when we had this stuff out, not last year.” The years cycle more and more quickly for me, like riding in that horrible/delightful gravity-defying cylinder where I was both weightless […]

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You Can’t Go Home

November 29th, 2015|

We had a lovely Thanksgiving visit with Grandpa Ted and Grandma Mary, packed with adventure. We joined 40,000 in a downpour for the Austin “Turkey Trott,” the one mile kid version, raising funds for local housing and food services. The kids dug for genuine Texas dinosaur bone casts buried beneath a giant sand pit at the Nature […]