![Jay David Jaden Shayla photo by Kenneth Caldwell](https://seekingfatherhood.com/wp-content/uploads/Stowsky-Kerr-New-Year-2021-5x7-hor-300x218.jpg)
Holiday 2021
December 4th, 2021 | holidays and celebrations
We’re so grateful for our summer Hawaii getaway; we thought it might be the start of our post-Covid life, but instead it was our one glorious taste of what we hope normal will look like one day. Soon!
![](https://seekingfatherhood.com/wp-content/uploads/bulb-view-of-bay-300x169.jpg)
Walking
November 25th, 2021 | daily life
There’s a sweet spot between 6 and 7:30am, and if I catch it, the whole day goes better.
![](https://seekingfatherhood.com/wp-content/uploads/PXL_20211027_033250595-300x169.jpg)
The Lonely Reader Recommends
October 31st, 2021 | daily life
There’s a sweet heartache in connecting deeply with a work, feeling like the creator knows you.
![](https://seekingfatherhood.com/wp-content/uploads/Dad-kites-2012-web-300x169.jpg)
Kites Flying
October 22nd, 2021 | daily life
There’s plenty to worry about with technology, but one thing that always delights is Google Photos sending me reminders of the past.
![](https://seekingfatherhood.com/wp-content/uploads/PXL_20210410_170007467-300x169.jpg)
Walking Back
May 31st, 2021 | daily life
I can feel it now. We’re going to find our way back to each other.
![](https://seekingfatherhood.com/wp-content/uploads/austin-300x169.jpg)
Post-Pandemic Plans
April 24th, 2021 | daily life
Perhaps I was counting too much on the relief being vaccinated would bring.
![](https://seekingfatherhood.com/wp-content/uploads/santa-cruz-sunset-300x169.jpg)
A New Kind of Dad
March 28th, 2021 | daily life
Every day calls for improvising and offers hope of new ideas, but sometimes it’s clear the whole plan has to change.
![](https://seekingfatherhood.com/wp-content/uploads/PXL_20201224_165339842-300x169.jpg)
The Yesterday Problem
December 31st, 2020 | daily life
I’m thinking about time on the last day of 2020.
![](https://seekingfatherhood.com/wp-content/uploads/Stowskerrs-for-2020-holiday-car-1000d-300x197.jpg)
Holiday Letter 2020
December 20th, 2020 | holidays and celebrations
This year has sometimes seemed like it happened to someone else, a long time ago.
![](https://seekingfatherhood.com/wp-content/uploads/Lost-brain-300x126.jpg)
Certainty
December 6th, 2020 | daily life
I feel envy for those who, presented with something new, quickly land on a position and seem confident in their choice. It happens to me occasionally, but usually I have to flipflop around like a fish out of water, until I either land on a position or put it off for later. I have many opinions and beliefs about things, it’s just that they can be contradictory.
![](https://seekingfatherhood.com/wp-content/uploads/sunset-1700-300x169.jpg)
Catharsis
November 19th, 2020 | adoption
There’s nothing like a rant to clear the decks. It feels great.
![](https://seekingfatherhood.com/wp-content/uploads/bulb-300x130.jpg)
Too Much
November 4th, 2020 | daily life parenting
Whatever else is going on, parents are expected to keep the kids safe, buffer them from the world, and help them make sense of things.
![](https://seekingfatherhood.com/wp-content/uploads/beach-roll-300x169.jpg)
What Words?
September 5th, 2020 | daily life
Early in quarantine I wrote of "grief" ... but now I've missed my father's passing and funeral, and I can't put any of it in perspective.
![](https://seekingfatherhood.com/wp-content/uploads/Wayland-Ted-Kerr-wide-300x188.jpg)
Wayland (Ted) Kerr 1934 – 2020
July 21st, 2020 | daily life
The fog of losing my dad lays heavy today; there’s sadness around the edges, but a big soft blankness as well.
![](https://seekingfatherhood.com/wp-content/uploads/Ted-Kerr-circa-1982-e1588554394600-300x202.jpg)
What Dad Wants
May 6th, 2020 | daily life
Making decisions for Dad feels strange because he always knew just what to do, and would not hear otherwise.
![](https://seekingfatherhood.com/wp-content/uploads/IMG_20200411_165009-e1588088984638-300x217.jpg)
The Luxury of Grief
April 28th, 2020 | daily life
Notes from the kid who had all the feelings in the family.
![](https://seekingfatherhood.com/wp-content/uploads/Caroline-or-change-300x298.jpg)
Change
April 17th, 2020 | daily life
Thinking about the deep, unsettling calm we slowly sink and settle into. And my favorite 3-hanky art experiences.