The Lady Makeup

November 4th, 2015 | gay dads holidays and celebrations

We were almost ready for trick-or-treating, but I could tell Shayla wanted to ask something. Her hesitation made it seem unlikely I’d be able to say yes. (No, we can’t take the pet rat with us. No, you can’t unstuff the couch cushons and use the fabric for your outfit. No, no, no….)

Camp Dreams

June 22nd, 2015 | daily life holidays and celebrations

One: Getting Here

It’s hard to remember, with the weeks of excitement and anticipation leading up to family camp, that what I should be reminding the kids, at least the older ones, is that the first day of camp can be tough.  Not for Jaden. Our 4-year-old is at home everywhere we’ve ever taken him. He gets right to work, charms all who might need to be charmed, and gets pretty much what he wants.

My Miranda July Superbowl

February 1st, 2015 | daily life gay dads holidays and celebrations

The best part about reading fiction, maybe any book, is the way a wonderful writer stays in your head. For a few days after finishing a book, it feels like I have some special goggles on, still half in the world of the novel.

Put On the Curb

January 12th, 2015 | holidays and celebrations

After the New Year, I get an itch to take down the decorations and get everything “put back.” Part practical, part compulsive. Use that vacation time productively! Don’t have pine needles and sorting out light strings and boxing up hanging over my head.

Growing Up Fast, Part 16

December 23rd, 2014 | daily life holidays and celebrations

My babies are growing up sooooo quickly.

Take Me to the River

September 29th, 2014 | holidays and celebrations

I’ve always felt at home in the water, refreshed, reconnected to something at my core. In Maggie Shipstead’s Seating Arrangements, there’s this great passage:

Our Historian

August 15th, 2014 | holidays and celebrations parenting

It’s been a year since we got married, and following a tradition I’ve heard about but never known anyone to actually do, we defrosted the top layer of our wedding cake and had it for dessert after dinner.

Both Here and There

July 29th, 2014 | daily life holidays and celebrations

I was startled looking at the Target check-out belt: skateboard, knee- and elbow-pads, and pullup diapers, all for the same kid.

Art, Vacations, Summer

July 14th, 2014 | daily life holidays and celebrations

We frontloaded summer vacation this year, a week of family camp that’s a beloved tradition, then a week at the beach in Southern California, a chance to prove to the kids that you actually can swim in the ocean, and time to hang out with all the grandparents. It was sweet.

Christmas and My Hamid Karzai Hat

December 13th, 2013 | holidays and celebrations parenting

I was smug at Thanksgiving when I didn’t get the bug going around. The kids puked onto me liberally, they spiked 103 fevers. I handled it calmly, even pleasantly, and I didn’t get sick. We had a nice Thanksgivikkuh! But if you believe in retribution, karmic payback came today. I got it, possible punishment for arrogance. 101 temperature, swollen lymph nodes. My volunteer duty at my daughter’s Pancake Breakfast tomorrow ruined.

More and More Married

September 26th, 2013 | adoption gay dads holidays and celebrations

I’ve been shocked by how changed I feel. I’m living with the same guy and kids, in the same place, same work, same dog, same cat. But a wedding, two adoptions, and a bridezilla reception has really changed how I feel in my life.

Watching from the Billboards Above

August 15th, 2013 | holidays and celebrations

As we drove to San Francisco city hall to get hitched yesterday, Jay was startled to see a billboard for the AVA apartments on 9th Street. And flabbergasted this morning to see an ad for Avah perfume in the Times. It’s not a common name to see in print—at least we thought it wasn’t—and we’d just signed paperwork giving our son the middle name Avram, after Jay’s mom Avah. (By Jewish tradition you give children a Hebrew name with the same initial as the honoree, at least that’s my Jewish-by-marriage understanding of it.)

In Love with Chuck E Cheese

May 29th, 2013 | daily life holidays and celebrations

Why do I find Disneyland completely enchanting and mesmerizing, and even enjoy Bass Outdoor World, but get the creeps at Chuck E Cheese?

Head Cold Christmas

December 26th, 2012 | holidays and celebrations

Christmas was not the disaster I’d prepared for, it was a different disaster altogether.  I was ready for emotional upset from the kids, remembering other homes and Christmases, big drama. They did fine.

I’ve Got the Music in Me

November 18th, 2012 | adoption holidays and celebrations

I grew up in Austin, Texas, live music capital of the country, so it was humbling to realize a few years ago that by far I’d seen local toddler band The Sippy Cups live more times than any other band my whole life. In fact, I had to admit they were perhaps my all time favorite. I might not win coolest taste in music, but I know what I like. The 6 or 7 times I took my godson to their shows were magical, and unlike adult music, I was never self conscious dancing to the beat. Being an adult in a mosh pit of 4-year-olds brings some advantages.

Fast, Fastly Forward

November 8th, 2012 | daily life holidays and celebrations

Halloween came and went, in a pumpkin-pulpy, sugary blur. The kids seemed stunned that we’d just knock on neighbors’ doors, asking for sweets. I guess it is strange. But so much of their new life mush seem strange to them!

Unappetizing Choices

October 13th, 2012 | daily life holidays and celebrations

I knew there was no winning this one: flu shot was not going to be popular. The sooner I told her what we were doing Saturday morning, the more the anxiety and upset could build. But the longer I waited, the worse the surprise would be.

Wait Over! We Meet The Kids!

April 17th, 2012 | adoption holidays and celebrations waiting and wanting kids

I’ve been in a happy shock, as well as a whirling-dervish of childproofing and preparation. We’ve met our kids! It’s been a blur, but here are the high points.

The Camping Box

March 29th, 2012 | daily life holidays and celebrations

What a lovely bittersweet feeling to dig out the camping box before our recent, disastrous camping trip. The charred cookware, chipped plastic plates, and other musty survivors of outdoor adventures past are like a little hope chest. The wishes and dreams of the naturalist, the visions of perfect forest visits and lovely outdoor excitement, and rest.

An Unearned Feeling of Hope

January 7th, 2012 | holidays and celebrations waiting and wanting kids

Is it just the slightly longer days, or has something shifted and lifted? I’d say things are looking up.