A full week of fulltime foster parenting.

Survived! Enjoyed! Endured!

I feel muddle-headed, daunted, overwhelmingly thankful.

Jay says it sunk in when they asked him to sign the “parent” line for a school form, and he thought “What? Sign as what?”

For me it was making my way up the uneven stone stairs with a sleeping baby, half-unfolded stroller, diaper bag, and wobbly 4-year-old. Thinking “Wow, I’m the one in charge of keeping these little beings safe. For the rest of their childhood.” And “They were right, this is going to be a first-class challenge!”

Then we were all on a walk with our dog, who got into a fight with another (huge) dog, and we had to take our dog for stitches and deal with the kids lunch. All the other stuff in life will keep happening and we’re in charge of these kids? (Dog is fine, recovering nicely, kids reassured).

I took the kids to their scheduled visitation with their mom, but she was sick. What a blow to the kids, though sadly I think they’re used to these kinds of unpleasant surprises.

We were delighted when both kids tried and liked Trader Joe’s crab stuffed flounder. Broccoli, edimame, a smidge of bok choy. Awesome eaters!

We tried, perhaps idiotically, to have a parent night out to keep a dinner/concert date with friends. It was great to see them, the kids loved it, my friends Paula and Julie did amazing babysitting. And I just about lost it, not ready to be without them, worried about them, not ready to let it take a village. Maybe it’s a typical first step, but it was far below the French-Daddy-With-A-Life I’m aiming for! (Jay did better–thankfully he and I worry about different things so he was calm and assured me, again and again, that we’d return to living children. Also he was nice about me being sullen and anxious during a very lovely Kristin Chenoweth performance.)

We ate, we took walks, we did our daily silly dancing to the Fresh Beat Band. Boy do I wish they’d come out with a new album, as I wake up humming their hit “I’ve been looking for a friend like you.”

… and it’s only been a week! Thanks everyone for the love and encouragement.