Night Walk
August 3rd, 2018 | holidays and celebrations
We returned from London in time to celebrate Jaden’s 8th birthday at home. He had insisted on this, had threatened not to go with us if we didn’t agree to be here, home, for his birthday.
Coming Back
June 28th, 2018 | daily life
Returning to civilization from a week at family camp is a delicate operation. I find myself out of sorts, wondering why I can’t finish 3 books a week, sit by the pool, and let the college kids entertain my children and feed us all.
Shaun and Spike are… Changing
May 26th, 2018 | parenting
One of the joys and tragedies of siblings is how much the little one picks up.
Seeking Happiness
May 19th, 2018 | daily life
I’m sure it will jinx everything to even write this down. There’s a good chance that my years-long quest will be jeopardized by even thinking this thought. But I believe that Comcast may have, might have, could have… fixed my internet connection.
Big Cheese
April 29th, 2018 | daily life
I have to say, the stakes are somewhat small. The PTA of our fantastic and lovely elementary school raises $150,000 to $170,000 a year, to support the teachers and kids. Fantastic for our community, and nothing to sneeze at. But hardly Forbes Magazine territory. Someone who managed to steal it all could have a very nice couple years in France, but wouldn’t be able to buy an island in the Caribbean, or retire for life.
They Blew Up Japan
April 15th, 2018 | parenting
Sometimes the raw honesty and directness of childhood takes my breath away.
His Own League
March 17th, 2018 | adoption
Recently I got a text message from another dad at school. “My son’s interested in joining/playing baseball with yours, can you tell me more about your league?” he asked. “Also is there a get-together at Fenton’s Ice Cream for the team tomorrow afternoon? We’ll try to make it.”
Anniversary, with Tween
February 21st, 2018 | adoption parenting
It was the 9th anniversary of the day we met, though not our wedding anniversary, which will be 5 years in August. My head spins at how quickly it goes.
An Hour of My Own
February 11th, 2018 | adoption
It’s Girl Scout cookie season, and you’ve got to hit it early and hit it hard. We had our booth set up on Solano Avenue. It was normally chilly for February, but somewhat of a shock after a hot, gorgeous week that was anything but normal. It’s fun to see the girls sell in a pack. When we first arrive and it’s just me and Shayla, she’s shy and doesn’t want to look at or interact with our potential customers, but once another girl or two are there the group sales mind takes over, and they’re chanting “Girl Scout Cookies” loud enough to be heard way down the block. You’re welcome, Peet’s Coffee patrons. And sorry.
Fever and Delirium
January 23rd, 2018 | parenting
It’s tiresome, how unprepared I am for the things that inevitably happen.
Scream
January 17th, 2018 | adoption parenting
It comes in waves.
My Month Off Facebook
December 29th, 2017 | daily life
It was an impulse, unplanned, but in retrospect inevitable. This had been coming. In early December I deleted Facebook off my phone.
The Breaking Point
November 25th, 2017 | parenting
The school secretary sounded serious. “Your daughter is ok, but I think she needs to be seen by a doctor,” she told me. She’d slipped in the mud playing football and her arm hurt.
Rebuilding
October 14th, 2017 | daily life
My mother lived only 2 days into her 54th year, and the end of her life was a case study of how we sometimes ramp up, into expensive and invasive treatment and activity, just when some softening and easing would be perfect. “We’ll fight this and beat this” has its place, but the push and urgency and violence of medical interventions that might make sense if the patient could recover seem a cruel setup when “winning” isn’t likely. Framing death as losing isn’t the nicest trip to lay on someone who should be settling her business and getting ready to leave the planet in peace.
Cub Scouts and Knausgaard
October 3rd, 2017 | daily life parenting
Really all I need is a simple way back to now. And I need it again, and again, and again. When I escape the trap of my worries, the real world seems so solid and beautiful.
Chimneysweep
September 27th, 2017 | adoption
The first week of school, and other terrors.
Labor, and Rest
September 4th, 2017 | parenting
As an anxious person, I spend a lot of time trying to calm myself (and others) down. As a loving person I long to be in synch with and connected to people.
Notes on (Family) Camp
August 6th, 2017 | holidays and celebrations
We spent a week at a camp for GLBT families July 29 to August 6. Yes, 8 days of camp. Here are some notes and photos.
Remembering Finnegan, 2001 – 2017
July 24th, 2017 | daily life
Finnegan was 16 and a half years old, which is quite up there for a Jack Russell Terror Terrier. Most of his life he was everything you’d expect: feisty and full of bravado, snuggly and in need of comfort. Jay says that as a puppy Finnegan charged out into the back yard, barking fiercely and wildly at a baby raccoon. He put on quite a show, but when called back inside, he came. And fainted dead away.
Birth Mom
July 12th, 2017 | adoption
This is the story of a confusing but important relationship.