My Miranda July Superbowl
February 1st, 2015 | daily life gay dads holidays and celebrations
The best part about reading fiction, maybe any book, is the way a wonderful writer stays in your head. For a few days after finishing a book, it feels like I have some special goggles on, still half in the world of the novel.
Put On the Curb
January 12th, 2015 | holidays and celebrations
After the New Year, I get an itch to take down the decorations and get everything “put back.” Part practical, part compulsive. Use that vacation time productively! Don’t have pine needles and sorting out light strings and boxing up hanging over my head.
Thank You for the Yucky Food
January 4th, 2015 | daily life parenting
I know it’s developmental. Kids are wired to be self-centered, and part of our job is to help them understand there are other people in the world. Sometimes they impress me, like when Jaden insists on bringing his big sister a treat if he’s getting one. Haircut lolipop? He’s got an absolute code of honor that he takes a second for his sister, asking nicely for it, and actually saving it for her. She manages to thank him because it gets more sugar into her system.
Growing Up Fast, Part 16
December 23rd, 2014 | daily life holidays and celebrations
My babies are growing up sooooo quickly.
Drawing the Future
December 12th, 2014 | daily life parenting
I’ve been thinking about a sketch I did years ago. In another life, really. Surrounded by sick and fearful friends, I immersed myself in what you might call the California New Age curriculum. We talked about our feelings, drew them, danced them. A skeptic would have a lot to make fun of. A believer could be changed forever. I’ve got both inside me, but on a good day the believer wins out.
The Family Bed
November 26th, 2014 | daily life parenting
We all know Jay and I didn’t turn out to be French Parents a la Pamela Druckerman. The vision sounded so nice: after eating a very adult dinner, the little ones loving the kale and trying everything, the kids trump off to their rooms, ready for bed. After books and kisses, no drama sleep while the parents have an adult evening.
Pondering Irrelevance
November 6th, 2014 | gay dads
Tonight I had the fantastic opportunity to attend the Out & Equal conference closing dinner,thanks to Jay’s connection Brigadier General Tammy Smith, the highest ranking openly lesbian or gay person in the US military.
Blue, and Red: I Am What I Drive
November 5th, 2014 | daily life
The day after the election and I’m feeling blue. As a kid we learned one did not discuss money or politics, period. So let me say something about cars.
Sign In Here
October 28th, 2014 | daily life
The kids were off to school, crazed about Halloween (Jaden: “Is it today?” Me: “No.” Jaden: “Is it the weekend?” Me: “No, it’s Monday.”)
Fall, Falls, Falling
October 20th, 2014 | daily life
Halloween and Daylight Savings time are sneaking up on us. Disney on Ice featured Cars, the Little Mermaid, and Toy Story. Actual cars, or actual model cars, zooming around the ice and acting out their parts from the movie.
One Small Success
October 13th, 2014 | daily life takes a village
A few weekends ago Jay gave me the wonderful gift of wrangling the kids while I did a daylong yoga retreat. It was unbelievably nice to have 8 hours at Green Gulch Zen Center in Marin, doing yoga and walking in nature.
Take Me to the River
September 29th, 2014 | holidays and celebrations
I’ve always felt at home in the water, refreshed, reconnected to something at my core. In Maggie Shipstead’s Seating Arrangements, there’s this great passage:
My Four Year Old’s Art Photos
September 3rd, 2014 | daily life
I’m not sure these photos Jaden took today require much explanation. This is slightly more than half the images he took. The beauty can’t be random, can it?
Crying in Office Depot Aisle 8
August 28th, 2014 | daily life parenting
Back to school! Second grade started Wednesday and I dragged Shayla clothes shopping and to get a haircut, rituals that feel as important as they are trivial. Why do we buy new clothes just before school starts? Our economy depends on us buying this stuff, but it’s deeper and more primal for me.
Disaster Avoided, Again
August 24th, 2014 | daily life
A long, rolling shake woke us this morning, a mild but persistent earthquake. Google says it was a 6.0 near Vallejo. It must have felt big there, but I’m not sure I would have noticed if it weren’t for the sliding door of the closet thumping rhythmically.
Our Historian
August 15th, 2014 | holidays and celebrations parenting
It’s been a year since we got married, and following a tradition I’ve heard about but never known anyone to actually do, we defrosted the top layer of our wedding cake and had it for dessert after dinner.
Both Here and There
July 29th, 2014 | daily life holidays and celebrations
I was startled looking at the Target check-out belt: skateboard, knee- and elbow-pads, and pullup diapers, all for the same kid.
Art, Vacations, Summer
July 14th, 2014 | daily life holidays and celebrations
We frontloaded summer vacation this year, a week of family camp that’s a beloved tradition, then a week at the beach in Southern California, a chance to prove to the kids that you actually can swim in the ocean, and time to hang out with all the grandparents. It was sweet.
Half a Life Ago
June 12th, 2014 | daily life
Twenty five years ago this week my mother, quite ill in the hospital, had her 54th birthday. She’d had surgery to install a port for some kind of chemotherapy, but she never fully woke up, though she did say “balloons” sometime after she came back from surgery. We had, in fact, filled the room with balloons. It was one of the last things she said, and two days later she died.