Flu Dog

2017-05-18T14:43:52+00:00 March 17th, 2017|daily life|

I'm not sure about where a cold ends and the flu begins, but there's a pretty bright line when I stop making dinner and take to bed. My husband and kids were on their own for parts of this week while I've been in an altered state. It's a great time to have a dog. Even our new, bad dog [...]

Not Just a Sick Day

2017-05-18T14:43:57+00:00 March 11th, 2017|adoption|

No matter how routine life gets, adoption has some special spikes in the road that are as predictable as they are surprising. I doubt I'll ever be fully ready, but I'm getting better at it. All was calm, almost peaceful aside from the hectic pace of school, work, life. Kindergarten and 4th Grade rumbling along in [...]

Persisting

2017-05-18T14:43:57+00:00 February 27th, 2017|daily life|

There's been plenty to have the winter blues about, this winter. Scary, out of control politics. Divided country. Too many dirty dishes, my daughter's book report is due, and it's not clear what's for dinner. I try to keep perspective, try to stay grateful for every wonderful thing I have. But there have been weeks, [...]

Not Ready For This

2017-05-18T14:43:59+00:00 January 14th, 2017|adoption|

The horror movies that scared me most when young (back when I watched such things) were not the "jump out" gotcha movies, but rather the ones where there's a slow-dawning realization that you've missed something important. Invasion of the Body Snatchers is the classic. By the time you realize your girlfriend was replaced by a vicious [...]

The House that Love Built

2017-05-18T14:44:01+00:00 January 4th, 2017|holidays and celebrations|

I was somewhat alarmed about wrangling my kids through the wedding of my dear friends Kenny and Paul. Not that I wasn't thrilled about the event. And not that we weren't ready. We had the dress up outfits ready. They love their uncles and were excited to go. But they're also in a feisty anti-authority [...]

The Darkest Night

2017-05-18T14:44:02+00:00 December 21st, 2016|daily life|

Sometimes I feel at odds with the whole world, in ways large and small. They sell toothpaste now in these great little containers. It's revolutionary, no gross mis-squeezed tubes, just a simple, easy-to-use bottle. But a trip to Target reveals that almost nobody in the consumer universe agrees with me. The oldstyle tubes in boxes take up [...]

The Love Boat

2017-05-18T14:44:06+00:00 December 13th, 2016|holidays and celebrations|

I'm not sure anything could have prepared me for being aboard the Disney Wonder, the 2,500 passenger cruise ship that swallowed us up and took us away last week. Certainly not the industrial Galveston, TX port, where except for a few Mickey-themed banners we might have been going into a warehouse to inspect the seafood catch [...]

Fifty Three

2017-05-18T14:44:07+00:00 November 15th, 2016|daily life|

Some random thoughts on turning 53! I think frequently about the fact that I'm just one year away from the age at which my mother died. I know this doesn't have more than emotional power. Facing life threatening illness with my friends in my 20s taught me none of us can take a day of life for [...]

The Second-Worst Day

2017-05-18T14:44:11+00:00 October 24th, 2016|adoption|

Shayla is attuned to everything going on around her. Precisely aware, for instance, of what her brother is getting away with, and whether it's fair. But she doesn't like to dwell on the past, whether 5 minutes or 5 years ago. Her therapist has long tried to get her to talk more about "before" our family, but [...]

Travel Madness

2017-05-18T14:44:12+00:00 October 12th, 2016|parenting|

We're just back from a whirlwind 4-day trip to Boston, and I know I should be celebrating keeping the kids alive through airplanes, subways, Ubers, and staying with friends. We had fun, we all came back, we didn't get kicked out of anywhere. That should be a win, right? But it's been hard to stop focusing on [...]

Quitting

2016-09-27T19:00:37+00:00 September 27th, 2016|daily life, gay dads, parenting|

Two recent endings have me feeling a bit deflated, though it's been tough to figure out exactly why. First, I'm giving up standing at work, or at least most of the time. I'd had great hopes for the benefits (health! vigor!), but after more than a year trying it, I think it's mostly substituted back stuff [...]

Puppy Medicine

2017-05-18T14:44:15+00:00 September 19th, 2016|adoption, daily life|

It wasn't long after we started trying marijuana that we realized we wanted another dog. Even though the pot was being ingested by our elderly dog Finnegan, I'm sure more than one person hearing this news will think we're high on drugs ourselves, but no. (For the record, the canine cannabis is non psycho-active. You can read more here.) We'd [...]

My Dog’s Pot Club

2017-05-18T14:44:17+00:00 September 5th, 2016|daily life|

I’ve never been a big fan of marijuana. The couple times I tried it, decades ago, I had strong, unpleasant reactions. I’m told it’s exponentially stronger today, which sounds much worse. I have no particular feelings about its use, though stoner culture doesn’t appeal to my German Protestant work ethic. For relaxation (not that we [...]

Summer Storms and Switching Places

2016-08-06T21:56:29+00:00 August 6th, 2016|adoption, parenting|

I should know not to tempt fate. Maybe a year ago I started feeling cocky, like we'd gotten this parenting thing down. Nobody knows what they're doing, of course, but I felt we're going to survive it—the adults, the kids, our marriage. I felt that everyone will emerge, more or less, unscathed. And of course we [...]

Coming Out

2017-05-18T14:44:22+00:00 July 6th, 2016|parenting|

It was time to start telling people. Probably past time. There's a dull pounding in my ears. I take a breath, and steady myself. As nonchalantly as possible, I say "Yeah, Jaden's in kindergarten in the fall..." Pause. "...Again." It's strange how vividly every time I ever told someone I'm gay flashes before my eyes when I've [...]